In Memory of Wilfrid Wilker

Wilfrid Wilker passed away early Friday morning the 28th January, 2011. He had a full and interesting life.

Wilfrid was born on the 1st June1927 in Kohlgraben bei Voelkershausen (Rhon) East Germany. His father was Karl Hermann Wilker (Dr Phil et Med/Jena). He came to South Africa with his father and stepmother when he was 6 years old.  They had to leave Germany because his father was opposed to Hitler.  They each were allowed one bag and they got a one-way ticket out of Germany during Hitler's reign.  His older sister stayed in Switzerland with friends of the family.

He went to Kearsny College, Hillcrest and wrote matric in 1944. He was often taunted as  "nazi" which made him very unhappy.

1945 - 1948 he studied medicine at Natal University College
1949 He worked with the Natal Road and Excavation Contractors in Pietermaritzburg.
1950 AECI in Umbogintwini.
1951 - 1952 He was with the Town Engineering Department in Pietermaritzburg.
1952 - 1957 Dept of Lands, Pietermaritzburg and Pretoria.

During this time he got married to Nita Wilker on the 10th of July 1954.
Sonja was born on 19 December 1956 and Mario on 8 May 1959.

1957 - 1965 Dept of Interior
1965 - 1968 Civil Service Commission
1969 - 1984 Department of Commerce
1984 - 1986 Dept of Commerce and Industries stationed as foreign attache in Bad Godesberg, near Bonn in Germany, after which he retired.

This picture was taken at his 80th birthday celebration 3 years ago. He will be sorely missed.

Nita Wilker says:
After a long and happy married life in different provinces and countries, with many friends made through his work, it will be difficult to adjust to doing our favorite things alone. He was a great friend and husband.

Our domestic, Joyce, who has been with us for 40 years, tells me what an extraordinary person he was - as I well know. His steadfastness & strength of character was a good example for Sonja & Mario whom he loved dearly. He never stopped worrying about their welfare.

One of his favorite things was to allow his grandchildren to play with his hair, to put clips in, and to "write" on his back with a finger, and guess what the words are. Sonja & Mario did this too on Saturday mornings when they were much younger.

Wilfrid had a great love of words. His most abiding and last interest was about the universe, the start & expansion, and the new discoveries made possible with stronger telescopes. He read widely from an early age, questioning things - a real enquiring mind.

So a full life has ended. With all my love, Nita

I (Sonja Wilker) read these passages that my dad had written before his death.

Wilfrid Wilker's Personal Message written for his own cremation ceremony in his handwriting, and transcribed below for easy reading, in Afrikaans and English.

Persoonlike Boodskap tydens verassing Aan diegene wat my afsterwe betreur of genoeg omgee om vaarwel te se wil ek net dankie se vir hul teenwoordigheid by die verassingseremonie vandag. Moenie my enigsins bejammer oordat ek nie julle sterk geloof in 'n geseende hiernamaals met ewigdurende vrede kan deel nie. Ek is tevrede om my laaste asem uit te blaas en om weereens deel van die kosmiese stof te word wat ook ons aardse biosfere uitmaak. In terme van die heelal aanvaar ek my algehele nietigheid en eis geen spesiale erkenning nie. Ek wil egter hoop en vertrou dat my kortstondige bestaan nie totaal vergeefs was nie en dat ek met toegeneendheid onthou sal word deur diegene met wie ek gedurende my leeftyd in aanraking gekom het. - Wilfrid Wilker

Personal message during cremation To those who mourn my final passing or care enough to say farewell in person, I wish to say thank you for your presence at this cremation ceremony today. Please do not grieve unduly that I could not share your certain beliefs about a blessed hereafter with everlasting peace. I accept my frail mortality and am content on my death to become again part of the cosmic dust which also constitutes our earthly biosphere. In terms of the universe I realise my utter insignificance and do not claim any special or divine recognition. However I do hope that my brief existence has not been entirely in vain and that I may be remembered with a measure of regard and affection by those with whom I came into contact during my lifetime. - Wilfrid Wilker

Mario Wilker read some letters of acknowledgment  that were written to my father during the years from a number of his colleagues and various other people he came into contact with.  He also read a lovely poem that he got from poemhunter on the web, which goes as follows:
Abou Ben Adhem (may his tribe increase!)
Awoke one night from a deep dream of peace,
And saw, within the moonlight in his room,
Making it rich, and like a lily in bloom,
An angel writing in a book of gold:—
Exceeding peace had made Ben Adhem bold,
And to the Presence in the room he said
"What writest thou?"—The vision raised its head,
And with a look made of all sweet accord,
Answered "The names of those who love the Lord."
"And is mine one?" said Abou. "Nay, not so,"
Replied the angel. Abou spoke more low,
But cheerly still, and said "I pray thee, then,
Write me as one that loves his fellow men."

The angel wrote, and vanished. The next night
It came again with a great wakening light,
And showed the names whom love of God had blessed,
And lo! Ben Adhem's name led all the rest.

-- Anonymous Submission 

My mum Nita Wilker looking rather glam.




We wish to thank family and friends for the love, support and generosity, for the beautiful flowers and other gifts that were showered upon us.  Also a big thank you to all who had traveled far to get here and share this day with us, to those who wanted to be here, but had other commitments, live way too far away, or for whatever reason couldn't be here, thanks for the good wishes and lovely messages.



Some of the gorgeous flowers. I didn't take pictures of all.

I was behind the camera so there were no photos of me, but my mom insisted we take a photo, so here you are, one of me too.




Please feel free to comment below if you feel moved to do so. Many thanks.